Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Knowledge Conquers Fear: October is Spina Bifida Awareness Month







One of my very favorite websites, posted a call to action concerning spina bifida and I am the type of person that does what she can when she is able to.  I am no martyr, I won't volunteer to help paint your walls, and I won't be driving an hour to you if you need soup, BUT I love supporting important causes and helping friends when it really matters.  If I can do something and I am able to in a small way help out or lend support, I am there! 


Please read New Latina's post to find out how you can help.  Also read and share this post so others can share and support this cause.  Here is my contribution to helping a cause that needs our attention and support. -Vicky B.



Laurita Tellado, of HoldinOutforaHero.org shares her story:

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October is an eerie month, filled with monsters, mummies, and the macabre. But while the occasional witch or skeleton might freak you out, one must concede that there are indeed more frightening things– like finding out your child will be born with spina bifida.


And yet, each day in the U.S., an average of eight families welcome a child with spina bifida into the world. Annually, an estimated 1,500 infants are born with spina bifida each year in the U.S.


I was born with spina bifida nearly two and a half decades ago. The diagnosis came as a total shock to my family, along with an entire set of secondary complications. I was also born with hydrocephalus, or “water on the brain.” During the first ten years of my life, it seemed I was in the hospital every other week with a bladder infection or shunt malfunction. I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t really scary at times.


But then, at age ten, I discovered a fantastic way to defeat my worst fears– knowledge. I vowed I would educate myself and read up on the condition that, up until that point, seemed to be taking over my life. Much like a child who imagines a ghost is in his closet, grabs a flashlight and realizes it’s only an old coat, I had come to the realization that, when you take the time to learn about something, no matter how terrifying it may seem at first, everything is less scary in the light of knowledge.


According to the Spina Bifida Association of America, “spina bifida remains the most commonly occurring birth defect in this country.” Just how common is it overall? PubMed Health, the Web site of the U.S. National Library of Medicine, reported in March of this year: “Myelomeningocele [the most severe form of spina bifida] may affect as many as 1 out of every 800 infants.”


As a 21-year member of the Spina Bifida Association of Central Florida, I’m doing my part to shed light on this condition by raising money for the Walk-N-Roll for Spina Bifida. When my parents and I moved from Puerto Rico to Orlando, Florida in search of better educational and healthcare opportunities for me in 1990, we found a support system away from our family and homeland in joining the SBACFL. My personal search for a public spokesperson for the spina bifida cause, as well as my work as a current member of the SBACFL board of directors, have helped me find my true purpose– galvanizing as many people as possible to support the spina bifida community.


So, in the spirit of shedding light on a little-known condition, and in honor of October, which is Spina Bifida Awareness Month, here are some statistics about spina bifida that might spook you a bit:




  • Spina bifida is more common than muscular dystrophy, multiple sclerosis, and cystic fibrosis combined.





  • Latinos have the highest incidence of spina bifida out of all the ethnic groups.





  • Ireland is the country with the highest incidence of spina bifida in the world.





  • About 50 percent of babies with spina bifida areselectively aborted after being diagnosed with spina bifida.





  • Doctors recommend that every woman of childbearing age consume 400 micrograms of folic acid daily to help prevent neural tube defects like spina bifida up to 70 percent of the time. In spite of this, there are currently an estimated 166,000people in the U.S. living with spina bifida– up from just 76,000 just last year.





  • About 90 percent of people with spina bifida are also born with hydrocephalus. Many need a shunt inserted near the brain to drain the excess cerebrospinal fluid– and many requiremultiple shunt replacements during their lives.





  • Other very common secondary conditions include bladder and bowel incontinence, as well as frequent urinary tract infections.





  • After the onset of puberty, young people with spina bifida are more prone to clinical depression than most people. Researchers think this may be due in part to social isolation.






Being able to share this information with all of you today is without a doubt the most empowering and inspiring aspect of my life. I’d love nothing more than to give you that very sense of empowerment. Please publish this post on your own Web site(s), and feel free to add your own personal intro that will make it relevant to your blog followers. As many people as I’ve managed to rally in support of this cause, you have an advantage that I don’t–your audience. So, please share this information with everyone you come into contact with.


Below is a video that explains just why the Spina Bifida Association of Central Florida means so much to me, and why I’m participating in the Walk-N-Roll.





I will be raising money online for Team Holdin’ Out for a Hero until October 29th, when we have our Walk-N-Roll event. Donations can be as small as $5 or as large as $50,000. (Yes, I do like the $50,000 better!) Every cent counts! Every cent of every dollar will go towards supporting families affected by spina bifida in 22 counties in and around the Central Florida region and supporting educational and awareness efforts.


Yes, to the new parent, or even to the already-grown individual, spina bifida can seem like a scary thing to deal with. But there’s a power in numbers and a strength in awareness– a strength that gives us the courage to open the closet, shine the light in the ghost’s face, and reduce it to nothing but an old coat.


Thank you for helping me conquer my biggest fear– ignorance of spina bifida.


~ Laurita Tellado, HoldinOutforaHero.org





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Monday, October 24, 2011

Quick Life Update and Exploring "Kindness And Kisses": Interactive Video That Will Take You To The Post You Want To Catch Up On. Just Click.

Working as a full time doctoral student and making a living on a part time salary has been one of the most challenging things in my life, but at the same time, I have been living a dream.  

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I have had time just for my academic research and dive into other passions.

Recently though, I've had a couple of setbacks and have come to a final decision of scaling back some of my academic devotion to devote a little more time on the ground hustling (you know, regular 9-5 kind of sort of).

This is a good thing.  I've been away from a "regular" work routine that now, I kind of welcome the new newness of it!

I will have my hands full, but it will be a good full!  So I start looking now for that "mostly" full time job while still keeping my developing projects going!  Many PhD students teach undergrad courses, and while I love teaching and have taught a handful of psychology courses in the past four years, I find that the kind of time and attention that it takes might not be the best fit, but I am not ruling that out for the next semester.

I am not going to settle for something that does not feel right so in the mean time your visits help me out- yes, this site is monetized and those are ads on the left and some other places.  I hand pick non-Google ads and they usually relate to the latest posts or they are helpful items that I think you might like to consider looking at.  Please take a look!  I make some pennies when you take a look and they are joyful pennies at that, because it comes from good intentions and a genuineness to share practical ways to live "kindness" and a promotion of loving actions.


This week will be post-full!  I will be sharing some more on health, wellness, and a post on how communication is about attitude, I will update you on my research, my social media involvement, my fitness goals, my dating life, and an upcoming conference in Chicago that I will be attending!  How am I going to do all that?! hmmmm....  


Oh, yeah, my goal is to be short and sweet!

Anyhoo, here's an interactive video to explore more of the posts here on Kindness And Kisses.


If you like a post, make sure to share it or tweet it! That helps a bunch! 

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Killing Ourselves Softly: Breast Cancer, Heart Disease, STD's & HIV, & Domestic Violence

I began a Face Book post like this, "Wishing all of the ladies BEST BREAST HEALTH, continued HEART HEALTH,   Emotional/Spiritual/Mindfulness HEALTH, and  Positive RELATING and COMMUNICATING HEALTH."
Google image

Let this month and next, especially as they are attached with special causes, be months where you take awesome care of yourself, your very real needs, your wants, and your dreams. 

Also, let this be a time where you DO NOT throw any woman under the bus! I love how expressions I hated are now ones I kinda dig.  Yes, let this be a time of compassion.

  • Do not talk ish about HER
  • Do not wish ish on HER
  •  Do not overly judge what she does, how she does, or who she does!  yup, I said it!

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Online Dating: Bad Behavior


(a little rant) Just Because It's ONLINE DATING...

[Originally posted on OKCupid's "Journal" July 2011]

picture credit:  gothamist.com
  1. Doesn't mean you get to be a bully when you are graciously rejected.
  2. Doesn't mean you can say you are a "gentleman" and then be a complete ass when a girl says she is not interested.
  3. Doesn't mean there are no repercussions resulting from your bad behavior.
  4. Doesn't mean you can ACT any which way and it be ok.
  5. Doesn't mean you are completely anonymous and therefore don't have to worry about being a person of integrity. 

Notes:
  • Rudeness, bullying, and name-calling are not acceptable or appropriate behavior for any adult, let alone the grown men that presumably are on this website.
  • I am so grateful for the amazing men that I do get to connect with here and off-line (where dating really happens), but there are a few men who are immature and have been very hurt by women and think this is the forum to let women have it (when they get a "rejection" message).
  • I absolutely think most men are brave and courageous for stepping out and stepping up to approaching the women that you find interesting and it is a risk, but the bigger man takes the risk and responds graciously- that's a "real man".
  • The grown up person understands that rejection is part of life and makes the most of it without becoming a child about it.
  •  How you respond to rejection and disappointment tells me more about you than your profile ever will. So I do appreciate you showing me that I made an excellent decision in saying "thank you, but no thanks."

Let's be mature grown ups! Best of luck out there people!
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Would you like to read more about what I have to say about bad online dating behavior? Visit here.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Being On The Family Feud Was Beyond Amazing


I would like to tell you that it was a piece of cake to get on the show, but it wasn't!
It was pushing ourselves to be awesome for the application process, the audition process, the waiting process, the hearing-back after getting told you "might" get picked, and it was embracing being chosen to audition again in Atlanta where we taped immediately after that last audition- and it was doing it all with a smile!  I am so blessed to be part of this family.  Above, from left to right, there is my Lil Sis, my Lil Cuz, my Twin Sis, my Sister-Cuzzo, and myself.  

I absolutely need to write more about the fullness of the experience, but for now, I will say, Steve Harvey is a sweetheart, three days in Atlanta rocked, and meeting a special guy in my travels made my time even sweeter.
If you want to get to know my family a little more, you can tune in on Thursday, October 13th and 14th, channel 9, at 2pm!  Cheer us on! 

Sunday, October 2, 2011

#Blogging: Who's That Girl? I Finally I Wrote "About" Her

 

Vicky's Quick Bio:
I am a believer in healthy love & romance, nurturing the authentic self, and loving life.
I have over 12 years experience as a Therapist with a focus on children, adolescent development and family dynamics.  I received my MSW from Hunter College School of Social Work and currently, I am in my 5th year in the Developmental Psychology PhD Program in NYC, attempting to complete my PhD in 16 months or bust!


I share my expertise via mentoring, consulting & personal development coaching.  I am a regular contributor to the online magazine, New Latina, and love all things social mediaI write about my own experiences, lessons, and general insights here on my blog, Kindness And Kisses.  



Saturday, October 1, 2011

Something You Can Do: "One Love Letter Project"

My dear friend, Kendra, has one of the biggest hearts ever and has so much desire to share something from the heart with young people who really deeply need to hear the message of love and hope.  This is a message from Kendra to all of you out there who know you can do something to share some light, hope, and love with young people.  Please follow my blog and "Like" the facebook page so we can stay connected as I feature more "Something You Can Do" posts, because there really is something you can do! Choose Kindness & Kiss Often! -VickyB
Image Credit: Google Images
Good people of the world,
I invite you to participate in the One Love Letter Project.